Sheilagh's Rare Blog 5/11/2008 San Blas, Mexico

(I refer to Jim's blog above this, so read his first!)

It’s Mother’s Day and we’re in the estuary in San Blas, anchored with three other sailboats.

Jim has been over there blogging for quite a while and he read me his latest for posting when we dinghy into town later today. Susan Jessie, our long-time neighbor from Sunnyvale said she wanted to know my take on this adventure, you know, a woman’s perspective! This seemed like a perfect opportunity! MY summation for the day’s trip that Jim described would have been something like: “We pulled up the anchor in La Cruz and motored on calm seas to arrive and anchor in San Blas just before a beautiful sunset.”

What was going on in my head was “attention-deficit” classic and notably female!!
My brain was doing its usual casting about: wondering if the swells would stay small, if the wind would come up, and if/when it did, we’d be sailing and I’d be “tweaking” the sails for max efficiency the rest of the trip. Since I like to keep busy, that would seem to be a solution for boredom, but the sail trim interests Jim more than me so it seems like I’m just taking orders non-stop! Then I mentally beat back the part about this boat being my house, and it’s rolling, for crying out loud, and technically (though not likely) subject to sinking! Then there’s the part where I can sit and read for about 15 whole minutes before I get restless and begin to wonder what I can clean, but its hard to get into cleaning a moving object. I fiddle with the GPS, mark our position on the chart, make a sandwich mid-day and go below and sleep to make the time go by.

So the male/female part seems to be that Jim can just relax and do almost nothing or totally enjoy the challenge of sailing. He’s retired and feels no need to be productive while I fret about being useful and busy. I certainly appreciate gentle seas and an autopilot but I can just feel Jim over there wishing there was more wind so he could get the sails up—it is, after all, a sailboat! But he was apparently very content appreciating this navigation experience as opposed to his Navy experience and happy to read and listen to his Ipod music and stories. I can work myself into a real funk about having no purpose at this stage in my life. Some women have hobbies like beading or photography or they genuinely enjoy the sailing—I haven’t ever been a “hobby” person (I kept a partially hooked rug for years out of guilt that I “should” finish it!) and though I do enjoy some sailing, after x number of hours, I’m just ready to be there (the attention thing), and attached to land either by anchor or dock (woman as keeper of the safe home).

I feel guilty even putting this to paper—Jim suggested I put it out there as a way to organize my mind--that and he just doesn’t do “girl-talk” very well! I was having this heart-felt conversation with him yesterday and it became apparent it was a one-way conversation! Aaaakkk!! He keeps wondering why I don’t experience it the way he does—but then that would make me more like a guy wouldn’t it? Vive la difference!!

I do enjoy the beauty of this boat, her efficiency, her systems, that it takes intention and detail for everyday tasks. We’ve seen incredible sea life and expect to see more in the Sea of Cortez. The other cruisers have been intriguing people and its easy to have instant rapport—we’re all a bit in awe of our adventures and proud of ourselves for stepping into unknown territory. Me included!

Jim can’t fathom why I don’t want to become a Sudoku master!! Now THERE’S a reason for living!

Ah, that feels better now. I'll be sending everyone who comments $50 for the therapy session....NOT! But thanks for listening.